Jason left “for good” just like three other times.  He said he would be back for his stuff on the weekend.  He didn’t.  Four weeks later a pair of his dirty underwear was still on the floor and three of his shirts were folded on top of Erika’s dresser.  Worse, he still had the key to her apartment.  At any given moment he could walk right in.  Or would he?   It was a daily hell trying to figure him out.  Ericka cried a lot and wrapped his  shirts around her to feel his presence.

TEXT MESSAGES

Jasen left a lot of text messages for Ericka. 

“Be back when I have time to think.”  

“Do you love me?” Ericka would text back..

“You know how I feel” he quickly messaged back.

Somehow Ericka always felt worse after these messages.  This was old stuff.  Why did she owe him time to think?   One day she shoved all his belongings in a black garbage bag and tossed them in the hall way….

TEXT MESSAGE  “I Want My Key Back”

“Come and get your stuff.  It’s in the hall.”

“WHAT?” he texted back.

“I want my key back.”

“You know I love you.” He messaged back.

“YOU CALL THIS LOVE?”                                                        

“Lets talk.  Be there at 6:30” he text promised back. 

HE DIDN’T EVEN KNOCK

Jasen  didn’t come at the time he said he would.  Ericka cried herself to sleep.

That night Jasen unlocked the door with the key he still had, and slipped into bed.

She knew it was unfair.  He had waited until she was too tired to confront him.

The next day the black garbage bag was sitting in the living room.

Jasen had come back to stay but for how long?

NO TRUST

Each time the “Come Back Kid” syndrome happened Erika trusted Jasen less..

She feared he had slept around while he was gone.  What disease did he come back with?

The name of the game began to be “Who owed who more?”  Did Erika owe him quiet acceptance to make him feel comfortable? {He might leave again.}

Did Jasen owe Ericka shopping sprees and dinner out for leaving and making her cry?

They were locked in a pattern they could not get out of.

ERICKA’S PSYCHIC READING

Ericka was stressed.  She felt like screaming when ever she went to work.

One day she called a Psychic.  She was hoping for good news to make her feel better.

PSYCHIC: What is your first name please? 

“Ericka”

PSYCHIC:   I see you are deeply sad and feel like a hurt child.”

YES, I DO FEEL THAT WAY.

PSYCHIC:  “Ericka, the man you love has become spoiled.   In many ways he feels as if you are like his mother.   Your love is unconditional.  Its time for tough love.”

“YES I FEEL THIS” confirmed Ericka. 

PSYCHIC: “What is the name of this person Ericka?”

“Jasen”

PSYCHIC:  “Jasen is seen being in love with you.  However the more he feels his need to be with you the more he also is afraid of growing up.  He knows he owes you the next level.   Responsibility and Commitment are not what he wants at this time.”

“YES I FEEL THIS.”

PSYCHIC:  “Ericka, its time to teach Jasen how to treat you.  You have become too available…too patient. ”

“I FEEL THIS TOO.”

PSYCHIC:  “Yes.  Each time you take him back he feels it becomes easier to disrespect you.”

“I KNOW.   WHAT SHOULD I DO?”

PSYCHIC:  “Your best coarse of action is to separate for 2 months on your own terms.”

“HE ALWAYS TAKES THE KEY AND LEAVES HIS STUFF.”

PSYCHIC:  “The advice seen and felt Ericka is to make a date for him to leave on your own terms.   Stick to your guns. Give him a date, say goodbye.  If he leaves in a rush take his belongings to a friend..   Change the locks on your doors if he takes the key. 

“WHAT IF HE DOES NOT COME BACK?”

PSYCHIC:  “This is your life and you must do what you want.  Ericka, is it being good to your Angles to hurt and cry?  Is this the love you want to claim for the rest of your life?  Be strong.   You will be proud you did.  If in 2 months this man has not changed his attitude move on.  Draw a circle around two months from now.  That is enough time for him to understand you demand respect.”

“I WILL TRY”

PSYCHIC:  Ericka?    There is another man seen for you in 2012.   There is seen a wonderful person who will cherish and love you.  The future is changeable with your wise actions.”

“THANK YOU FOR BEING HONEST WITH ME.”

CONCLUSION

In many ways Ericka felt the Psychic confirmed what she already knew.   The odd part is she had only given names.  She had not been asked for any details.  Better yet, Ericka felt lighter.  It was not a friend or relative offering advice or insisting she listen to them.     Ericka had gone to the Psychic on her own accord and her privacy was sacred.