The Achieve Radio Blogosphere
Children from torn homes, who watched a parent go through abuse or settle for less, may have been utterly disgusted, in complete bewilderment as to why their parent did not recognize what was happening to them. As often happens, the children suffer the wrath or disappointments from the “shat on” parent. Parent doesn’t mean to psychologically beat up child, but just showing this kind of behavior is a slap in the face.
Role model behavior, good and bad, runs deep, and before they know it, these adult children may find them selves repeating the very behavior they swore never to do. It happens so subtly, that when they finally recognize it is happening to them as well, they tend to have three reactions:
First Reaction: An immediate break up! The fixer is shocked they would allow someone to do to them, what they saw their parent let happen. Oddly, immediately and blindly, they listen like a counselor, write supportive letters, and become completely immersed into “emotional breast feeding” with yet another broken winged bird. Each abusing and using person has their own fascinating story, each different in some way from the other. Seldom do the emotionally wounded stay long, but suck the breath away from the emotional-breast-feeder until healed, then fly away. At this point a feeling of helplessness sets into the fixer.
Second Reaction: Emotional-Breast-Feeder breaks up with the controlling manipulative user completely, and swears off All relationships. The problem is the fixer may recreate the same dynamics in friendships. Suddenly they are crying, feeling used, while at the same time knocking themselves out to give gifts, listen to hours of wailing on the phone by distressed friends who run like mad when they see the emotional-breast-feeder needs attention in return.
Third Reaction: There are some wizened emotional-breast-feeders that become so determined to never become a fixer again, ……that they become the Abuser and User in relationships themselves. In a complete reversal, instead of seeking healthy solutions for a mutual sharing relationship, they see the world as “Use or Be Used”. To the utter amazement of family and friends, they see their dear one become a demanding bossy tyrant, and wonder if they are seeing things correctly. Wasn’t this their dear shrinking violet not long ago?
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Georgia Jean has over 25 years of study in tarot, metaphysical and healing practices. Her specialty is calling in the essence of SOULMATES and ATTRACTING PROSPERITY. Frequently connecting with the energy of crossed over relatives and friends as part of her sessions, she offers practical advice on how to proceed with life decisions. Get insight on relationship dynamics with LOVERS, FAMILY MEMBERS, a BOSS or FRIEND.
